Letter to Microsoft

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Microsoft

Dear Dudes,
I am writing you dudes to let you know you should totally hire me. I mean why wouldnt you? My skills are totally sweet, and by totally sweet I mean bitchin'. And I totally have, like, a crapload of experience and crap.

I play video games all the time. If you played you me you would get your asses kicked. I like watching movies too, but not shitty stupid ones like that stupid ass movie with Mandy Moore in it. If you want a top notch movie watcher, im totally your dude. Oh ya I also have teleki-whats-is powers. You know how handy that could be?

What are my references? My mom says really cool. So you know I'm friggin' awesome when even my mom thinks im super rad to the max.

What good will hiring him do you ask? Well let me tell you if you dont hire me one day your companies stocks will plummet and you will ask yourselves "Dudes why didn't we hire that one dude? He would have, like, totally saved our asses and shit." And I'll be there laughing my ass off about what stupid dumbasses you were.

I would totally be an asset to your company. If you dont believe me you are all friggin' morons. Call me on my celly when you decide to hire me

Peace Out,


DJCoolPants

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